Now, you probably won't remember, but you were in a pile-up on the motorway. You're going to be okay, you'll walk again and everything, but...
A farmer drove to a neighbour's farmhouse and knocked at the door. A boy, about 9, opened the door. "Is your dad or mom home?" said the farmer.
While they were there, the wife passed away . The undertaker told the husband, "You can have her buried here in the Holy Land for £150 or we can have her shipped back home for £5,000 .
Naturally, the doctor asked him, "What happened to YOU?"
Great 'Laughter Spot'
When he found out that he was going to inherit a fortune from his dying father, he decided he needed to find a wife with whom to share his wealth.
The owner looked at her and said, 'Look, I should tell you first that this bird used to live in a house of prostitution and sometimes it says some pretty vulgar stuff.'
Q: What do ducks get after they eat? A: A bill!
Many thanks to Richard Goard in Surrey for these gems. The graphics are by Shutterstock.
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