jokes
The wax museum just acquired a very good wax figure of ex prez Bill Clinton.
They had it arranged to show him in an authoritative stance in front of several staff members set on a stage made up like the oval office.
After the figure had been on display for a couple of days, the museum employees were constantly having to go in and rezip Bill's zipper, it kept falling to the 'down' position.
A man and his wife were awakened at 3:00am by a loud pounding on the door.
The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push.
"Not a chance," says the husband, it's 3:00 in the morning! "He slams the door and returns to bed. "Who was that?" asked his wife.
A woman awakes during the night, and her husband isn't in bed with her.
She goes downstairs to look for him. She finds him sitting at the kitchen table with a glass of whiskey in front of him.
He appears to be in deep thought, just staring at the wall.
Please check this latest Laughter Spot. The lesson here is do not chat to chemists. Enjoy ...
Pope Chauffeur
After getting all of Pope Benedict's luggage loaded into the limo, and he doesn't travel light, the driver notices that the Pope is still standing on the curb
Jeremy Corbyn asked the Queen. "Your Majesty, how do you run such an efficient organisation? Are there any tips you can give me?"
*Will you please send someone to mend the garden path? My wife tripped and fell on it yesterday and now she is pregnant.
*I am still having problems with smoke in my new drawers.
A newly married couple moved into their new home.
The next day, the woman asked her husband: "Darling, one of the pipes in the bathroom is leaking, could you please fix it?"
The husband looked at his wife and said, "What do I look like to you, Bob the Builder?"
A man was sitting on the edge of the bed, observing his wife, looking at herself in the mirror.
Since her birthday was not far off he asked what she'd like to have for her Birthday.'I'd like to be twelve again', she replied.
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Preparing for a