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Women for Women : “Why did he cheat?”

If you’ve ever been the victim of infidelity, the one thing you’ve likely wondered is, “why did he cheat?” You’ve asked yourself that question dozens of times and may even think that learning the reason for the affair will keep it from happening again or relieve the intense sense of betrayal you feel.

The truth is, knowing “why” won’t keep it from happening again and it won’t lessen your pain. Why not? Because you are not a cheater. If you have respected the boundaries of your marriage it is likely that you will never fully be able to comprehend why a man would go outside the marriage for sex.

The reality is that you can’t control what a cheater does by understanding “why” the cheater cheats. And understanding “why” won’t lessen the pain over his betrayal.

The reason the cheater cheats is because he has an internal character flaw that keeps him from being able to exert self-control. He functions on the mistaken notion that going outside his marriage will solve problems in the marriage or fulfill his needs in some way.

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photo credit: denharsh via photopin cc

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